your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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