a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
