'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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