Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
