I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
