Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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