idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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