We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
