Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
