I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
