Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
So drunk its hurt
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Is Oprah even human
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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