Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I can't put those talents on a resume
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Randomize