Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
