3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Randomize
