Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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