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• (765): View more from Indiana

  yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.

  (1-765): View more from Indiana

  yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.

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• (660): View more from Missouri

  I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point

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• (530): View more from California

  As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (757): View more from Virginia

  Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight

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• (818): View more from California

  Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Get you some cowboy.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.

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• (941): View more from Florida

  He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...

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