It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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