Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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