Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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