Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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