i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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