She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
