weddingsv make me drug and hornr
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
