As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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