Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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