Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
