yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
