Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
