I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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