I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Hippo gnu deer
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
