Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
