My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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