Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
