Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
