so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
