Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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