What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
