take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
