her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
