so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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