ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
