im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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