it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
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Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
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I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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