If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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