If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
