You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize
