omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
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She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
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he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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