How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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