porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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