we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
